Monday, August 09, 2004

Fun Things I Learned at Work Last Week

1) According to Sports Illustrated, the Romanian rhythmic gymnastics teams claim that they lost the European championship because they were hexed by 15 psychics hired by the Russian team. Those crazy Russians! I think this is brilliant, and the perfect solution to all of my problems. Someone bothers me at work, it's hexing time. My random neighbor practices his horn instrument at 7:30 in the morning on a Sunday again? Hex his ass. I mean if it can work on those tiny little girls with the ribbons, than surely it can work on anyone. Although I didn't know that Psychics practiced hexing. I thought they were less proactive than that.

2) Not only is there a calendar of Outhouses available, but people actually buy it. I don't know what's weirder, the fact that someone had the idea that taking pictures of a bunch of outside toilets would make an excellent calendar, or that someone wants to greet everyday of an entire year with bathrooms. That doesn't say much about your expectations for the coming year. Plus, they don't even show the toilets, which I think we can all agree is the heart of any bathroom. So it's just a bunch of small buildings in the middle of nature. If they didn't tell us, we could just as soon assume it was a shed or something.